Notwithstanding anything in this section, teachers who are considering adopting or adapting any of these tips or suggestions are encouraged and reminded to do so in an informed way that a) respects collective agreements, b) adheres to board policies and other regulations and laws governing the profession, and c) does not adversely affect their own well-being.

In the event that you experience statements, behaviours or actions from parents or guardians that make you feel uneasy or unsafe, withdraw from the situation and seek immediate assistance and support.

Try these strategies to prevent potential conflicts:

• Maintain professionalism in all your contact with parents (in person, oral and written).
• Be transparent and explicit about communicating classroom, school, board, Ministry expectations and policies but avoid using educational jargon that can alienate parents or cloud an issue.
• Presume positive intentions on the part of parents and guardians and work with them to create a positive, healthy parent-teacher relationship that prevents negative or destructive conflict from arising or taking root.
• Suspend judgment and focus on listening openly when entering into conversations with families. Attentive listening can help you to better understand the source of a conflict.
• Anticipate potential times of conflict or issues that typically can elicit emotional responses and be proactive about matters that may be common flashpoints or catalysts for conflict. Consult the Conflict Calendar that follows.
• Try to resolve conflicts early or in a timely fashion; do not risk escalating a conflict by avoiding dealing with the issue. And, if you are not able to address an issue immediately, be sure to commit to a specific time when you will contact parents about the issue.
• Use language that invites open dialogue and trust such as “I can see/appreciate that you’re upset about X. Can you help me to understand what the key issues/concerns about X are for you?”
• Try to avoid the “blame game” which often engenders defensive postures or creates the perception of a win-loss scenario. Instead, try to arrive at mutually agreeable solutions to issues or concerns.
• Consult, when appropriate or necessary, with other colleagues or professionals (at the school, board, federation level) before contacting parents (e.g. guidance counselor, special education teacher, settlement worker, social worker, psychologist, administrator, union steward/local union president).
• Use a five-step problem-solving approach to negotiate ongoing, persistent problems:
  • Define the task or problem and describe the desired result.
  • Brainstorm ideas and decide which idea to use.
  • Make a plan.
  • Try it out.
  • Reflect and adjust as necessary.
•  Be aware of the Ethical Standards for the Teaching Profession (http://www.oct.ca/public/professional-standards/ethical-standards).

Try these strategies to mitigate against the escalation of conflicts that have emerged:

•  Gauge your own feelings and responses. We are all subject to a spectrum of natural, human responses and acknowledging them helps us prepare to channel them appropriately.
•  Listen attentively for underlying issues that may not be clear at first by what a parent or guardian articulates.
•  Try to avoid language or non-verbal cues and signals that could be misinterpreted or misconstrued as a defensive posture or closed mindset.
•  Before you connect with parents/guardians about a sticky or thorny issue, try running your anticipated or planned response (to a parent/guardian) by a colleague to solicit their feedback.
•  Consult, when appropriate or necessary, with other colleagues or professionals (at the school, board, federation level) before contacting parents (e.g., guidance counsellor, special education teacher, settlement worker, social worker, psychologist, administrator, union steward/local union president).
•  When time allows, plan conversations by setting clear goals for the conversation. This can include: setting a reasonable time limit; establishing ground rules; using specific questions that get at different ways of thinking about a problem or conflict; making sure that those most impacted by the conversation are a meaningful part of it.

Try these strategies when conflict re-occurs or escalates despite your best efforts:

• Seek assistance, support and counsel from other colleagues or professionals (at the school, board, federation level) before meeting with or contacting parents (e.g. guidance counsellor, special education teacher, settlement worker, social worker, psychologist, administrator, union steward/local union president).
• Know your rights and your responsibilities.  Exercise both diligently.  Any issue or concern that makes you susceptible to charges of misconduct and/or that could potentially result in disciplinary actions or sanctions by your school, school board or the Ontario College of Teachers, must be reported to the member services department of your appropriate Affiliate organization (ETFO, OECTA, or OSSTF).

Conflict Calendar

Potential Sources of Conflict/Stress Between Teachers and Parents By Month. While the following chart identifies some common sources of conflict and stress, it also represents times before or at which we can be proactive to help avoid potential conflicts.

This section offers some considerations, approaches, and strategies that could be harnessed to support working with parents and guardians. These suggestions should be personalized by a teacher or educator to meet their own needs and to respond to their specific context. Furthermore, clearly some tips reflect approaches that cannot be undertaken by an individual teacher.

Notwithstanding anything in this section, teachers who are considering adopting or adapting any of these tips or suggestions are encouraged and reminded to do so in an informed way that a) respects collective agreements, b) adheres to board policies and other regulations and laws governing the profession, and c) does not adversely affect their own well-being.

In the event that you experience statements, behaviours or actions from parents or guardians that make you feel uneasy or unsafe, withdraw from the situation and seek immediate assistance and support.

Try these strategies to prevent potential conflicts:

• Maintain professionalism in all your contact with parents (in person, oral, and written).
• Be transparent and explicit about communicating classroom, school, board, Ministry expectations and policies but avoid using educational jargon that can alienate parents or cloud an issue.
• Presume positive intentions on the part of parents and guardians and work with them to create a positive, healthy parent-teacher relationship that prevents negative or destructive conflict from arising or taking root.
• Suspend judgment and focus on listening openly when entering into conversations with families. Attentive listening can help you to better understand the source of a conflict.
• Anticipate potential times of conflict or issues that typically can elicit emotional responses and be proactive about matters that are common flashpoints or catalysts for conflict. Consult the Conflict Calendar that follows.
• Try to resolve conflicts early or in a timely fashion; do not risk escalating a conflict by avoiding dealing with the issue. And, if you are not able to address an issue immediately, be sure to commit to a specific time when you will contact parents about the issue.
• Use language that invites open dialogue and trust such as “I can see/appreciate that you’re upset about X. Can you help me to understand what the key issues/concerns about X are for you?”.
• Try to avoid the “blame game” which often engenders defensive postures or creates the perception of a win-loss scenario. Instead, try to arrive at mutually agreeable solutions to issues or concerns.
• Consult, when appropriate or necessary, with other colleagues or professionals (at the school, board, federation level) before contacting parents (e.g., guidance counsellor, special education teacher, settlement worker, social worker, psychologist, administrator, branch/local union president).
• Use a five-step problem-solving approach to negotiate ongoing, persistent problems:
  • Define the task or problem and describe the desired result.
  • Brainstorm ideas and decide which idea to use.
  • Make a plan.
  • Try it out.
  • Reflect and adjust as necessary.
•  Be aware of the Ethical Standards for the Teaching Profession (http://www.oct.ca/public/professional-standards/ethical-standards).

Try these strategies to mitigate against the escalation of conflicts that have emerged:

•  Gauge your own feelings and responses. We are all subject to a spectrum of natural, human responses and acknowledging them helps us prepare to channel them appropriately.
•  Listen attentively for underlying issues that may not be clear at first by what a parent or guardian articulates.
•  Try to avoid language or non-verbal cues and signals that could be misinterpreted or misconstrued as a defensive posture or closed mindset.
• Before you connect with parents/guardians about a sticky or thorny issue, try running your anticipated or planned response (to a parent/guardian) by a colleague to solicit their feedback.
• Consult, when appropriate or necessary, with other colleagues or professionals (at the school, board, federation level) before contacting parents (e.g., guidance counsellor, special education teacher, settlement worker, social worker, psychologist, administrator, union branch/district president).
• When time allows, plan conversations by setting clear goals for the conversation. This can include: setting a reasonable time limit; establishing ground rules; using specific questions that get at different ways of thinking about a problem or conflict; making sure that those most impacted by the conversation are a meaningful part of it.

Try these strategies when conflict re-occurs or escalates despite your best efforts:

• Seek assistance, support and counsel from other colleagues or professionals (at the school, board, federation level) before meeting with or contacting parents (e.g., guidance counsellor, special education teacher, settlement worker, social worker, psychologist, administrator, union branch/district president).
• Know your rights and your responsibilities. Exercise both diligently. Any issue or concern that makes you susceptible to charges of misconduct and/or that could potentially result in disciplinary actions or sanctions by your school, school board or the Ontario College of Teachers, must be reported to the member services department of your appropriate Affiliate organization (OECTA or OSSTF).

Conflict Calendar

Potential Sources of Conflict/Stress Between Teachers and Parents By Month. While the following chart identifies some common sources of conflict and stress, it also represents times before or at which we can be proactive to help avoid potential conflicts.